Thursday, June 9, 2011

Walk by the Wood's Edge

Walking down a quiet road
        by the edge of the woods
Crisp leaves crunch underneath
        my slow and steady step.

A cool breeze runs through my hair
        and a lone car rushes by.
A bird sings a sweet melody,
        and a tear drops down my cheek.

I cannot shake this heavy feeling
        that weighs down my every breath.
I cannot shake these sorrowed thoughts
        that weigh down my hollow soul.

I'm waiting for the pain to disappear
        and for normalcy to recommence.
But I know things are never going to be the same,
        because missing you'll never get any easier.

Nevertheless, I will keep on walking
        down this quiet road by the wood's edge.
And, I will do my best to rise above
        this grief that is weighing me down. Because

 Every step I take
        is filled with dreams.
Dreams of things that were,
        that are,
That will one day be
        my reality.

Number 2

You use me only when it's convenient or necessary.
Once you're done you toss me aside
and don't even bother to pick me up when
I roll off your dusty desk.

If I become too dull for you,
you just cut me up until I fit your needs.
But someday I'll be too worn down to sharpen
and you'll just replace me with someone new.

You use me. Abuse me.
Bite me. Chew me to bits.
And then deny the scars.

But if I try to leave a mark,
you can simply erase my words
and with them, the proof of my existence.

Honestly,
I know that I am only temporary,
and that one day you'll exchange me
for something more permanent.

I just wish that until that day comes,
you'd treat me like I was number one,
and not just number two.

That Smile

That smile.
What does it mean?
Don't look at me with those teasing eyes,
and expect me to know your intentions.
I'm tired of your double entendres,
your sarcastic, and impatient sighs.
What is it that I'm not seeing?
You've got me lost and confused
with your unsolvable riddles.
Why don't you just remove the
veil that covers your heart?
Show me your true self.
Tell me what that smile means
and let me be yours
forever.

Brightest Star

Love is that brightest star in the darkest night.
I can never grasp it, no matter how high I climb.
But I will never stop reaching for it.

There are nights when that brightest star,
shines so brightly that I can feel its warmth
from the tips of fingers to the core of my heart.

But those nights are few and far between and easily forgotten,
when compared to the nights during which that brightest star
is diminished to a weak sparkle lost in the stinging cold darkness.

Still, a sparkle is better than nothing at all.
And I will keep on reaching for my brightest star
until those nights of cold and darkness are gone
and forever replaced with the warmth of that brightest star.

Lost

I am lost in the dreams of tomorrow
      that will never come true.
I am lost in the worries of today
      that will never go away.
I am lost in the memories of yesterday
      that will never return to me.

I am lost in the love
       you smothered me with in those first precious days.
I am lost in the lies
       you told me when I would lay by you at night.
I am lost in promises
       you made to me but never bothered to keep.

I am lost
Lost
never to be found

I am lost
Lost
never to be found

Swollen Geography

Bright open eyes that twinkle
                 like fireflies in the night.
Loud melodic laughter that rings
                 like bells in the morning.

Eager to learn, eager to experience.
Nothing escapes her notice, and
she becomes filled with the beauty of life.

I wish I had a map.
     so I could read the swollen geography
           of her heart.
     and keep here eyes and laughter
           with me forever.

Change

Red to Blue.
Blue to Green.
All these changes make me want to scream!
You try so hard to keep up with the latest scene,
that you've gone and left behind your dreams.

Green to Yellow.
Yellow to Pink.
There's too much going on, I need time to think!
Your expectations of me have reached the brink,
Let me go now, or soon I'll sink!

Pink to Orange.
Orange to White.
I will never give up this fight.

Violent Sunset

Violent Sunset

What will we do now?
Now that the violent sunset
of our youth has burned away.

The warmth that once
colored our cheeks
has drained away and left only ice.

And the memories that
filled us with sweet joy
have been subtly laced
with bitter sorrows.

But none of this matters.
I will survive the passing of the sun,
the stillness of dusk, the haunting twilight,
just as long as you are with me
when the dawn finally breaks.

Meaningless

This poem is meaningless.
No really, it is.

There is no symbolism,
   no hidden allegory.
You won't find any motifs
   much less any allusions.

There is no point to this.
It's just theme-less prose.

So don't even bother analyzing
a single line, or verse.
Don't put words in my mouth,
this is just a sentence, nothing more!

Yes, this poem is truly meaningless.
I didn't even make it rhyme!
I'm just wasting your time.
So go on, turn the page,

Because this poem is meaningless...

..to you.


Elsa

On March 20, 2011, my mother passed away. She was an amazing person and I miss her everyday. This is a small speech I wrote and spoke at her mass. It would mean a lot if you took a second to read it.

Elsa.

There are many words I could use to describe her, but none would ever do her justice.

Because my mom was beyond description. Beyond mere words.

I could tell you that
    her hair was raven-black,
    thick and silky smooth.
I could tell you that
   even though her eyes were dark,
   they still shone brighter than stars.

Or I could choose to tell you about her unconventional personality, her ability to inspire hope in the darkest situations, and her inability to understand sarcasm. But whatever I chose to tell you will never be enough.

Because Elsa was so much more than all those things combined.

All I can tell you is what Elsa was to me.

To me, she was a loving mother, and an endearing friend.
She was someone I could run to when I was feeling down, and needed a warm embrace or kiss.
She was a person I respected and loved, and was respectec and loved by in return.
She was my motivation, my inspiration, my everything-ation

Yes, to me Elsa was everything and I learned so much from her life.

From all the adventures she told me of, and I experienced with her - like the time in the Chitwan National Reserve in Nepal when we woke up in the middle of the night and stole a green banana- I learned to never be afraid of new situations and to instead take those new situations as opportunities to experience something different and special.

From her long 11 year fight with cancer (or as Maya says 10 years and 11 months, Maya likes to be precise)- I learned to be determined and to keep on fighting to reach my goals and dreams, to never give up.

From her vibrant personality - and knack for moving around the furniture every month- I learned to be unique, to think in new ways, to be unconventional and different from the crowd... and some basic interior design skills.

But most of all, and this is something I learned from her everyday life, I learned the importance of love and a caring smile.

Elsa lived a life full of love.

There was the love she received:
   Love from her incredible family,
  which is a lot of love if you consider it's ridiculously large size,
  I meet a new relative at every family gathering.

  Love from all her friends around the world,
  which is another unbelievable amount,
  since Elsa made friends everywhere she went,
  and she went to more places than I can count.

And of course, love from Ze, love from Maya, and love from me.

So ,what did Elsa do with all this love?
She gave it back tenfold.

And this exchange of love, that occured everyday in her life, was evident in her smile.

Elsa knew the importance of a simple, caring smile.
A smile that is full of love is one-of-a-kind, and that's how hers was, one-of-a-kind.

Elsa's smile could light up a room, and win the heart of any person.

I think it's her smile tht I will miss most.

Well, there's a lot more I could go on to tell you about my dear mama, but like I said before, it will never be enough.

Elsa was a very special person, and I;m sure everyone here agrees.
She will always be in my thoughts, in my actions and in my heart.

I will celebrate her wondrous, love filled life forever.

Elsa, I love you.
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