I went to look at the starry sky
hoping to see you twinkling—smiling down at me.
But all I found was a cloudy filled night,
cold and empty of light,
empty of you.
My dreams are still infected
with the broken wishes I made to you
but did not have the time to keep.
This is what my nightmares are made of.
I have run away from the world
to escape the shadows in my heart.
In this new barren place I’ve come to,
there are no traces— no reminders,
and you become nothing but a figment of a memory.
Here there are no singing yellow daffodils
And thus I see no ghosts of you gardening them.
Here there are no whistling tall trees
And thus I have no desire to climb them with you.
No birds flying high in the air.
(You used to want to fly with them.)
No butterflies hiding in the bushes.
(You used to find them in the flowers.)
No songs for me to hum softly in the night.
(You used to fall asleep in my arms.)
Here, in my new haven, there is nothing— nothing
because you were my everything— everything
and now that you’re gone
what is there left for me?
Now I only have the nights where
I find myself looking up
To where there should be a sky.
I still hope to see you there
Smiling for me.
For Elsa. I miss you <3 Je t'adore <3