The Hesitant Astronaut

I was told

That the sky was the limit

But I that should reach for the stars

Because if I failed at least

 I would land on the moon.

I was told

To wish upon a shooting star

And to keep my eyes turned skyward

Because space was the last frontier

And one day I would reach it.

I was told. I was told.

And there was a time that I believed

All those clichés and half assed comments.

 I’m not so sure anymore.

Because there is still so much I have not

Seen right here on the ground.

Space is the mistress that

I used to dream of…

But

I have found pleasures here on Earth

That she could never gift me.

Once upon a time

I would have given anything

To leave this atmosphere

But today I finally see 

That I’d much rather stay here.

Where I can admire the stars from afar

And have the ones I love by my side.

~~~~~~~~~
Had to write a poem for Creative Writing class titled "The Hesitant Astronaut".
It's alright x3 I got to use cliches again ;D~!

postpostpostpostpostpostpost

RAWR.

I feel like posting a whole bunch of poems I've been meaning to put up but haven't.

So yeah.

READY. SET. GO

Speaking of Stream-of-Consciousness ...

Stream-of-Consciousness

Why is my mind so scattered these days?

I can’t concentrate

I can’t even think

because every time I stop

you show up in the back of my mind

and all my focus flows to you.

I think of that day we first met

both too shy to say much

 but you laughed at my jokes

and I laughed at yours

and that day you first opened

 up to me after a long joyful night

you told me your secrets

and I told you mine

it seems that

nothing else matters

anymore

you are all I need

I want to laugh and cry and hold you tight

I just need to be by your side

 you’ve stolen my life

and I don’t even want it back

I hate that I love you

I love you I love you

                                                            I love you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Since I'm revealing the secrets of my process ;) , here's what this poem looked like once upon a time: 

Rough draft:

Why is my mind so scattered these days?

I can’t concentrate

I can’t even think

Because every time I stop

You show up in the back of my mind

And you laugh and you cry and you hold me tight

And all my focus flows to you.

Nothing else matters.

I love you I love you

 I hate that I love you

Because you’ve stolen my life

And I won’t every get it back.

I don’t even want it.

All I want is to be by your side

So I can laugh and cry and hold you tight.

You are all I need.

Nothing else matters. 

The run-ons of lies, dreams and fantasies

Oh look, another random post on how I write stuff! :D I'm pretty sure I do those more for my benefit than anyone else's. Helps me straighten out my mind, haha.

Anyways, sometimes I like to just sit down and write whatever comes to mind. Stream-of-consciousness style. ;3 Usually what I get out of it is a never-ending flow of sentences that sound cool individually but ridiculous when put together. Like the poem-thing below. There are many parts of it that I like, a lot, but then I read it all at once... and... well... it's not the best thing ever. 

What will most likely come of this is me stealing random bits from this and making them their own piece. 

~~~~

To say that I didn’t need you

Would be lying to you.

To say that I didn’t want you

Would be lying to myself.

But the truth leaves me speechless

I don't know what to say anymore.

My mind has stopped- frozen-

I am frozen in this moment

Of utter bliss.

…

 I hope.

I hope it's never-ending

This feeling that has made me

Its ever willing prisoner.

Oh yes!

I can’t help but wish and dream

That it won’t ever- Ah! A Dream. 

This must be a dream.

That would explain everything.

It would explain

Why I can’t stop smiling day and night

Why I can’t stop grinning like a fool

Why I can’t stop thinking about you

Why I can’t stop rambling on and on

Why.

I .

Can’t.

Stop.

Loving.

Every.

Phrase.

That.

I.

Am.

With.

You.

And .

Hating.

Every.

Sentence.

We.

Are.

Apart.

…

Indeed, this is a fantasy, is it not?

It has all the perfect moments to make it so.

A stroke of serendipity bestowed upon me

While I lay awake pretending to slumber.

Perhaps this means

The stars of my mind have finally decided

I am worthy of reward—

That.

That is why they are shining so brightly,

Guiding me straight to you

By outshining the sun itself.

Surely, nothing else explains this.

I have escaped reality finally

And you were my portal- my escape.

…

I wonder.

Is pretending this is a lovely dream

Lying to the both of us?

If so it’s a beautiful lie

and one I’m willing to keep up,

But only until the day

The truth overcomes the fantasy.

Because when that day comes

I will let go of the hold I have on this dream

And gladly fall into reality’s arms.

Lies may be sweet and comforting,

But

honest love

can never be conquered.

Until then,

I will willingly live among these

lies, dreams and fantasies.

Story-making

Take my hand and we’ll go on an adventure.

Time to travel to a brand new dimension.

Pirates and cowboys and robots, oh my!

Hide in the shadows and play I spy.

Over the rainbow and under a troll bridge,

The portal to Narnia’s hidden in my fridge.

Let’s fight monsters and save the princess,

Like superheroes answering calls of distress.

Are you ready to go on an epic quest

To find a gold-filled treasure chest?

Dance at the Witches’ All Hallows Eve ball

And cast magic spells meant to enthrall.

We’ll battle dragons to prove our might,

Then explore the wonders of the night.

Discover a fairy world within every tree

And mermaid utopias underneath the sea.

That’s how it goes in storybooks,

Where nothing is quite what it looks.

The beautiful may be wicked hearted

But true lovers can never be parted.

Together we can be our own fairytale

Because if we believe, we will never fail.

You and I are the next legend

Our myth will be told until The End.

So, come with me and let’s go explore

this magic world, and be together evermore.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I've been working on this for three days :3 Hope you like it, I'm pretty happy with it. For once. xD

Just a quick post

I love looking through my notebooks. I always find little stanzas and phrases of things I started but never finished. Usually I stop them because I lose inspiration, but when I look back again I get new ideas. It's also really fun to wonder what I was thinking when I started writing them. I just found these:


I don't need anyone

to see me break down.

No one needs to watch

my tears flow to the ground.

~~~

Pleasure is a fickle mistress

sometimes she comes so easily

and delights you with her gifts

but other times she is so cold

~~~

Self Expression

That drop of yellow paint on the wall.

That streak of green on the sidewalk.

That sparkle floating in the air.

That is who I am.

The shadow lurking off screen.

The star twinkling in the sky covered by clouds.

The small daisy hidden in a bouquet of roses.

That is who I am.

A figment of your imagination.

A product of procreation.

A consequence of action.

That is who I am.

~~~

So yeah,  right now these aren't much. They're jewels in the rough, ideas that still need to be developed... but this is a good little sneak inside view as to how I think and write. I have small samples like these everywhere, and every once in a while I come across one and I get hit with inspiration. So I take these ideas and I play with them and sometimes what I come up with will be just a final version of the original and sometimes it is nothing like the initial work.

I wonder what these will turn into. I can't wait to find out. :)

You Gave It To Him

You gave it to him,
His reason to live.
His reason to give.
And then you took it from him.

He smiled for you.
He sang for you.
He killed for you.
But you still left him behind.

Why?

What is the purpose
of changing someone's life
for the better, forever...

When in the end
             you break their heart?

When in the end
             you crush their dreams?

When in the end
              you take away their breath
leaving them cold, still,
               lifeless.

You gave it to him.
The gun.
The despair.
The reason.

You gave it to him,
Before you said goodbye.
As you walked out the door.
After you disappeared.

Now, you're gone
and so is he.
But I am here.
Only I remain.

Alone.

I wish you had given it to me instead.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This was a poem I wrote back in September or October. It was for my Creative Writing class, we had to open a book, pick a sentence at random and then use it to make a poem or a story or whatever we could think of.

My sentence was "You gave it to him." from Kurt Vonnegut's Cat's Cradle.